Sponsor my mustache so children can learn…

Seriously…

Check out the link below.

mustachio

Mustaches For Kids:

http://www.donorschoose.org/donors/viewChallenge.html?id=20214

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Published in: on December 3, 2008 at 3:56 am  Leave a Comment  

The Greatest Rivalry EVER

I now want to write an article about the greatness of the rivalry that is Notre Dame-USC.  Like so many other great college football rivalries, this is one where you can pretty much throw the records out the wi—- oh wait, no. I’m sorry, did I say Notre Dame-USC?  Oh, I would bet everything I own on that looking more like an episode of Oz than a football game

 

oz-22

Published in: on November 25, 2008 at 3:59 am  Leave a Comment  

advertising that works.

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Published in: on November 16, 2008 at 12:00 am  Leave a Comment  

hollywood takes to the NHL

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Published in: on November 15, 2008 at 11:57 pm  Leave a Comment  

monkeys like poop.

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Published in: on November 15, 2008 at 11:53 pm  Leave a Comment  

Top 10 Coaches with the Most Capital (An Election Day Special)

Now that our country has chosen its next leader, much is always made in the coming weeks about just how much political capital the president-elect has to spend. Which got me thinking . . . . Which people in sports – specifically which coaches – currently enjoy the most capital?

Call it plain old job security if you will, what’s important is that we’re moving beyond the tired, nearly impossible debate over who are purely the best coaches and introducing a new variable you can sink your teeth into: context. Obviously a coach going .500 at Kentucky hoops is going to be less secure than a first year coach that brings his squad from the cellar to respectability.

You’ll notice that more college coaches make the list than pro. This is to be expected as the professional level is even more of a what-have-you-done-for-me-lately business. Finally, I should mention that I gave very little consideration to hockey because it is extremely boring and on the verge of becoming irrelevant.

Pete Carroll (USC)

You gotta figure – with how much he’s done for that program that quickly – he’s got at least 3 consecutive shitty seasons before there are even whispers.

Mike Krzyzewski (Duke)

This man will decide when his career at Duke is over. Period.

1

I'll leave when I'm good and ready, dammit

 

Ben Howland (UCLA)

Waiting just two years before ripping off 3 straight Final Four appearances will get the boosters behind you in a hurry.

Jeff Fisher (Titans)

They stuck with him through some mediocre years. Here’s betting they keep him around for next year with the way this season’s shaping up in this small-market, small-pressure serene Southern city.

Gregg Popovich (Spurs)

Also a beneficiary of a smaller-market, lower-pressure environment. Also a beneficiary of 4 titles in 10 years.

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We're going to be spending an obscene amount of coaching capital

Bill Belichick (Patriots)

Even with last season ending in monumental disaster and even with some of the Beli-genius aura being tarnished this year in the absence of the Golden Boy and even with Spygate . . .

Nick Saban (Alabama)

Say what you want about his ethics. He can flat-out coach.

Phil Jackson (Lakers)

How To Fire A Guy With 9 Championship Rings

1. Don’t.

3

Or did I fire you?

 

Urban Meyer (Florida)

Win a national championship in your second season as coach and you’re good for a while.

Roy Williams (UNC)

”  ”            ”  ”                      ”  ”          ”  ”                       ”  ”          ”  “

Published in: on November 6, 2008 at 5:43 am  Leave a Comment  

Top 5!… Worst NHL Jerseys

There has been a lot of talk on Superawesomesportsawesomeblog.Nice about how great some NHL jerseys are. The vintage throwback days of the original six teams are still arguably the best vintage jerseys of any professional sport, and the current NHL trend of paying homage to those vintage roots has made many teams uniforms that much better and more memorable.

But alas, there is also a dark side in the NHL. That dark side occured during the late 80’s and early 90’s. This is what happened.

5. Milwaukee Admirals:

Yikes. What i like most about this jersey is that is multipurpose. It can be both a picnic blanket and a great clubbing shirt if you hang out with the lumberjack crowd. On long road trips, you can also use it as a travel checkers board. The subtle blend of checkered shitty browns really make you appreciate how easy blind people have it some times…

4. Los Angeles Kings:

Arguably the gayest of all NHL jerseys. Not only does it have glitter, silver sparkles and a FABULOUS purple tone, the women’s jersey’s with “girlie” colors dont look too much different.

3. St. Louis Blues:

If Paula Abdul has taught us anything, she taught us these two rules:
1. Opposites attract.
2. Having a cartoon cat mascot does not make anything better, even if it is to display polar duality of rule #1. Plus, it is kind of retarded.

2. Vancouver Canucks:

This one is so bad, it makes an appearance both as #2 and #1. The original Canucks jerseys were blue, green, and white, and had a green oval logo with a hockey stick in it. If you glance at it, it looks like a whale’s head. In the late 70’s and early 80’s, they decided that a much better idea is to ditch the logo, switch to Halloween colors, and just have a giant “V” on their chest. There are too many “V” jokes for me to even begin to make fun of this.

1. Vancouver Cancucks:

I mean… really?

Published in: on October 31, 2008 at 8:07 pm  Leave a Comment  

They don’t call us Trampa Bay for nothing…

I thought 7-run leads were only tentative in football.

That is, until i was abruptly corrected by the Tampa Bay (formerly Devil) Rays. Apparently, when you have never been in a dominant position as a team, with a massive lead in a playoff series-clinching game, you don’t know to play it hard to the bitter end, and that no lead is safe and that coasting is going to end the game any quicker.

(Hey, where did our lead go?)

I guess thinking about champagne baths is especially distracting when you are usually playing golf for a good three weeks at this point every other season.

Either that, or their bats just got hot and didnt deserve to in the series…only time, and the Phillies, will tell.

Published in: on October 23, 2008 at 4:03 pm  Leave a Comment  

TOP 5!… erection-inducing moments of the week

5. Dustin Pedroia hitting two identical home runs to left field in the Home Run Derby, err, i mean, ALCS game 2 in Tampa Bay.

Not only did he blast two out to the same section of seats at Tropicana Field, he has pulled himself out of his early playoff slump and re-established himself as a dangerous batter at the plate. A run-producing Pedroia, with the speed of Ellsbury batting first, the Red Sox should be on the board every inning those two are up to bat.

4. The Arizona Cardinals calling timeout just milliseconds before the cardinals block what would have been the game ending kick from 52 yards. Timeout is rewarded, the cowboys re-kick, and Folk nails a 52-yarder to send the game to OT. Short-lived momentum, but that could have been the game for Cardinals with that useless attempt to ice a kicker.

3. The NHL is back and the Boston Bruins are good. Not that I don’t love seeing the Celtics, Patriots and Red Sox doing well and winning championships, I’d rather see the Cup hoisted by the Black n’ Gold.

2. How much fans in LA love Manny Ramirez. He could rape a retarded 3-year old boy and the only punishment he’d get is having to sign an autograph for that retarded child. Either that, or just hit a Home Run against the Phillies in the NLCS. Seems pretty even-handed, right? I mean, the guy is hitting .450 in the playoffs. That is unheard of.

1. Frank Gore giving my fantasy team a much needed boost on Sunday. 101 yards rushing and a touchdown on a very outmatched 49ers team… those are stats i desperately needed against a guy with McNabb as his QB.

Published in: on October 13, 2008 at 1:19 am  Leave a Comment  

Sage Advice from a Homeless Man: Patriot Games

Here’s some sage advice for you: Silence is golden, unless it is not.

Don’t believe me? Then go fuck yourself, that is what.

For example, Al Davis accused the Patriots of cheating recently. Of course, we know that the Patriots may have video taped the Jets, but what we can also assume here is that Al Davis had gay sex with Bill Belicheck and is using the classic “blame the victim” defense.

The Patriots didn’t need to “interfere” with negotiations with Randy Moss. Unless the Raiders were offering sex slaves and $1 Billion in straight cash, homey, Moss was going to be out quicker than a roofied supermodel. (p.s. – is that the correct way to use roofie as a verb?)

Even still, based on how well Al Davis picks his players, those sex slaves would probably be nothing more than Al himself giving handjobs through a glory hole in the locker room stalls. (not that those can’t be good…)

Anyways, the point I’m making is that we assumed that even someone with a sordid reputation such as Belichick was innocent…that is, until he denied it, thus substantiating Davis and his claims, however crazy.

Before long, Al Davis is going to take a page from the Sarah Palin playbook and make Belichick pay for his own rape kit.


(Let’s rape abortion in the bud… that is the expression, right?)

Published in: on October 4, 2008 at 10:47 pm  Leave a Comment